Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Are you holding back your life?

The previous posting I've made today was about self-development. Self-development is about improving yourself toward a more positive side of your life. I'm sure that everyone one to have a better life, nobody wants to 'downgrade' his/her life. I was thinking about those people who are trying so hard to improve their way of life but somehow still not be able to make improvement or development. Maybe something is holding back their life. It's like they a ship that dropped an anchor and can't sail. Same thing happen to people who stand still and don't make any change in their life. I've heard someone said about things that are holding back your life. There will be negative outcomes out of it. This means that people won't see any possibilities that come along their way, even if they see it, they always think that they won't be able to do it because of this and that. It's like there is this thick and tall wall blocking your way and you know that you can't climb it, even if you haven't try it. That's how it's like when something is holding back your life. How about you? Is there something holding back your life? If there is, read the article below and try to make your own change.

5 Things That Are Holding You Back in Life

1. Fear
Fear is the number one thing that will hold you back in life. And fear comes in primarily two forms:
fear of failure and fear of success.
People who have a lot of fear never end up achieving their goals in life because the are too afraid of what they might achieve or have to go through trying to bring about those achievements. Fear is a big one for me, I am still very afraid. I am afraid of success for the most part. And it is crippling.
Let me share a little example with you. Four years ago in India I was traveling with three friends, all from different parts of the world. We had the idea that we wanted to go and visit this great yogi who lived in the high mountains and we all agreed that it was a wonderful idea. Upon starting out on the journey, however, one person (a young American man) changed his mind and decided that the journey was too dangerous. We bid him farewell and continued on anyway and within two days we were sitting in this yogi’s personal quarters having been granted a private audience. Fear stopped our companion from experiencing something truly wonderful for this meeting has shaped our lives in many ways.
2. Attachment
The next thing that will hold you back is attachment. This attachment comes in many forms and it is extremely powerful as it is something that humans do very well. The downside, however, is that nothing good ever comes from attachment. It always causes suffering.
Take a look at yourself and see if you are attached to anything and then see whether that attachment is holding you back. You might be fond of your homeland, parents or current lifestyle and that fondness might be stopping you from moving forward. The great Buddhist master Gampopa said that if you want to be happy you need to leave your homeland as soon as you are able. Otherwise your life will be characterized by attachment.

3. Arrogance
Some of my relatives are extremely arrogant. They think they have all the answers about life and business and religion. The problem is they are all really unhappy. I strongly believe that if they just took a few minutes to get out of their own way they could begin to discover a lot more in life.
Never assume that you have all the answers. Always ask questions and keep a sense of curiosity. Even the most learned people like Albert Einstein and the Dalai Lama keep a sense of humility because they realize that there is still so much to be learned and discovered.
4. Dogma
Dogma is a very dangerous thing. It is where you become so blinded to a way of thinking that you are closed off to all other possibilities. It is where you accept something as fact without taking the time to really establish whether or not it accurate. And, like all things here today, dogma is holding you back in a big way.
Dogma, especially religious dogma, stops you from finding the real “juice” of the subject. When you are dogmatic about your religion you lose touch of the essence as you are so caught up in defending your own position, even to yourself. Religion, in its truest sense, is supposed to make you more open and spacious, not less. Avoid dogma if you want to grow internally.

5. Money
The quest to earn more money holds you back as much as anything does. The journey to be financially free has ruined more people’s chance at happiness than anything else. I honestly wonder how much better life would have been for my parents if they had spent their time learning about satisfaction as opposed to wanting something better. Perhaps their life would have been all the more fulfilling.
Don’t let money hold you back in life. If you find that you are putting work ahead of family, spirituality or other more genuine pursuits in life then you need to make a change. It will be a source of regret in the future.

(source from - images via justbesplendid.tumblr)


Anonymous said...

I agree with all of these points! One of the best changes I've ever made was disowning the family, leaving old friends behind and changing my name...what held me back for so many years was fear and attachment. Once I was able to focus on those, it was easier than I thought it would be!!

boya arsila said...

I really agree with the 'fear' point. Mostly what's holding us back is fear I believe. But look at to beat the fear..good for you Rain=)